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32 Things Introverts Wish You Knew

Introverts speak out about what they wish others knew about introversion.

Nik MacMillan/Unsplash
Source: Nik MacMillan/Unsplash

Never too proud to let others do my work for me, I asked introverts on my Facebook page what one thing they wish the world understood about their introversion. They had plenty to say, sometimes with multiple exclamation points, which is the introvert version of a primal scream. Which of these ring a bell for you? What would you add?

  • I need time to think (and sometimes overthink) through things we just talked about before I can give an answer. I don’t do well off the top of my head.
  • Every moment does not have to be filled with chatter.
  • Not wishing to talk on the phone is not rude, a character flaw, or a psychological problem.
  • Introverts are not lonely.
  • I don't need to be fixed.
  • Silence doesn’t equate to being antisocial.
  • That we need alone time to recharge. It’s nothing personal if I go off to be by myself.
  • Too many people in one room is draining. I can do it, but I need a nap after!!
  • Introversion is not the same as shyness.
  • I hate the phone. Please don't call, it's very intrusive. Send a f#$%ing text instead (or, even better, an email!). If you really need to talk on the phone, we need a "date."
  • If I'm talking or telling a story, my pauses are not an invitation for you to talk.
  • Don’t take it personally when I don’t want to talk.
  • I hate networking and play-acting scenarios at workshops. Extroverts invented them and revel in them.
  • “No, I’m not mad. This is my happy face.”
  • I don’t need to be more social to be a better part of the team.
  • I haven't been waiting to "come out of my shell."
  • Surprises and cliffhangers are the worst. Tell me what's going on, tell me the most important parts, and give me time to absorb and process.
  • Just because I value my time alone does not mean that I don’t also value my time with you.
  • We aren't always mad.
  • To ask before inviting others to join the two of you.
  • Not to take it personally.
  • Even though my child may not be charismatic and involved in all types of school activities or sports like your child . . . that does not mean my child is not just as special as yours.
  • That I like people, just in small groups or one on one.
  • That we don’t need to be changed into extroverts!
  • Being quiet doesn't mean we don't know what's going on!
  • That we know what’s best for ourselves.
  • That sometimes (many times?) I’m my own best company.
  • We are happier than we appear.
  • Written communication is so much easier for us than talking! And it's not us being too detailed or too formal or too technical or too polite or too intense: It's us finally being able to express ourselves fully!
  • Don’t talk to me at breakfast!! I have a whole night of thoughts to process!
  • That roughly 50 percent of the population is made up of introverts. Introversion is very common.
  • That we just get tired and need to recover. We’re not all lame and antisocial!

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